Shop Till Ya Drop

Okay, everybody knows how fashion challenged I am. Apparently me and my dress in multiple colors is legendary, annoying not just my husband. He comments a couple times a month "can't you wear something different", my friends tease me, my kids actually help me pick out which color to wear each day! Its amusing, but getting rather old. So last week my dear husband gives me a good sum of money and orders me to the mall. I wasn't sure if I should be grateful or offended. But I enlisted the help of my fashion savy friend, Jenny, and we hit the malls today. As I sit here now, at midnight, my butt hurts and my legs are sore....oh wait, thats probably from the yoga we did earlier at the gym, although I'm sure all the shopping didn't help! After the gym this morning we herded the kids back to my place to critique my meager wardrobe. I pulled a lot out and threw it in the good will pile. I rearranged what was in my closet so some things I don't wear often, but are very flattering, were more prominate. Then Jenny surveyed the useful "what not to wear" books she has and we made lists. One list of styles that flatter my body type, that I can keep in my wallet to pull out whenever I go shopping. And another list of specific items that I am apparently required to have as staples of my wardrobe, top on the list....a pair of jeans. I own no jeans. I hate pants. They suck and are uncomfortable. Our first stop was Lane Bryant, where my opinion of jeans completely changed. In Lane Bryant world I wear a size 3 for one thing, which sounds much better than an 18. Top that off with they have pants actually designed for women, you know, people with hips, butts and other curves, not waif skinny stick figures that teen agers are now days. I fell in love with two pairs, got some perty earrings too (they were on the official must have list....I usually just wear studs) Our next stop was the actual mall....after a pit stop at Del Taco first, gotta have fuel to shop! We hit New York & Co for tops, Payless for shoes, Vic Secret for bras, then deviated from the official shopping plan and stopped at Bath & Body for some of the mint lip gloss that Jenny has and we all covet. Our last stop of the night was supposed to be Old Navy, we were sure it was open later than the mall, but to our shock, it closed at nine too!! Then I had the bright idea to actually call the one near my house, its on the strip, it has to be open later, and sure enough, it was. So more tops were bought at Old Navy, Jenny had to forcibly drag me away from a blue cotton dress, but otherwise I stuck to the shopping list and found quite a few casual, but cute, outfits. As I expected, when I got home, everybody else was asleep. There was nobody to revel in my new found style. But never fear, I left everything in the bags and will lay out each outfit for my dear loving husband in the morning so he may ooo and ahhh over every little detail....okay, so he will look at it all and ask why I didn't go shopping a year ago, but he'll still appreciate it in his own way, although he might complain that I don't actually need any more shoes.